Love what you love
…it’s the reason you exist
“Love what you love.
Bloom for Yourself
Hold onto it with every atom
of your being.
Because, what you love
is the reason you exist.“
A song I’m currently enjoying:
Your reason for being
Some pieces I write become little chameleons and change their meaning (to me) as my mindset shifts and evolves. The “Love what you love” piece was written with reference to discovering what your soul is drawn towards, and then allowing it to consume you. It is what I discovered when I first started writing, and it became my purpose, and my reason for being. It is still that. But, the other meaning of this piece has become very apparent to me over the last few months. To love everything. Because, I think it is the greatest reason why we carry on – for love. And not even for the love of others, although this goes without saying, but simply for the love of our own little routines, and books, and practices; for the little things we love and nurture in our daily life.
“Today, like every other day,
we wake up empty and frightened.
Don’t open the door to the study and begin reading.
Take down a musical instrument.
Let the beauty we love be what we do.
There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground.“
— Rumi
Love everything: the little things, the inhales, the moments of life.
There is so much I adore in this Rumi poem.
When I read “we wake up empty and frightened” I think of the automatic act of remembering—the way we reach backwards to remember the weight we are carrying. The fears and anxieties. The recent wounds. The emptiness we inherently are at the start of each day, (and the delicious possibility of remaining that way), frightens us. We need the story of us. So we open the door of the mind and allow the mental images to appear – “Don’t open the door to the study and begin reading.” We trace our steps back to where we left them before sleep. And we pick them back up at the start of a new day.
“Take down a musical instrument.” Be here with your true self; reach forwards into life, reach for what you love. Touch your own aliveness, and create, (for yourself.) “Let the beauty we love be what we do.” Every inhale is a gift, so love every inhale.
“There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground.” There are hundreds of ways to stay present and honour every waking moment.
Of course, in practice, it may not be that easy or simple. Which is why a daily routine helps to remind me to keep my heart open and embrace my life from the second I awaken, rather than turn away from it. A daily routine helps me reset – empty myself of any pain I no longer wish to carry, and start each day “kissing the ground.”
“When you find your healing space
your soul will draw everything
connected to that space towards you.
When you find your healing space
you will breathe a different air,
walk a more tender path,
embody a softer light.
When you find your healing space
guard it with love and attention,
for this healing space is who you truly are.This healing space is your life.”
“Softening” – 1st December
In “the sweetness of doing nothing” blog post, I wrote about how my healing space is a necessity for me; a survival tactic.
Nearly eight years ago, I attended weekly coaching sessions at an addiction recovery centre, and my therapist and I prepared an action plan for my recovery together.
We spoke about my goals, not just for recovery from substance abuse, but for recovering my overall health and well-being. When I underwent treatment for breast cancer, I became an avid believer in using a holistic approach to any type of recovery. For me, recovery is not just about recovering our minds from destructive thought patterns, but about recovering our physical health too. I think too much emphasis is placed on the mind / body connection and not enough on the body / mind connection. It is reciprocal— the mind responds to the body, and the body responds to the mind.
Those weekly sessions were just the start of what I knew, even then, would be a life-long process of healing. And now, nearly 8 years later, all the things I listed in my plan – all the things I was so passionate about but too far removed from due to the grip of addiction – writing, meditation, studying spirituality, exercise, art, healthy living, have become my identity. They are all the things I now identify with. I turned away from identifying as an addict, and I nurtured the polar opposite of that – the version I set my heart and soul into.
Everything I love has become who I am, and who I always was beneath the limited and destructive beliefs. But, best of all, it was a vision I gave myself permission to step into by simply turning towards it. It was already there, waiting. It was free, and it has grown and evolved into everything I wished for. It is still growing, and expanding, and changing me, and humbling me each day.
Our lives begin afresh each day.
It is never too late to bloom.
Start creating your life out of love for your life
Something happens when you decide to consistently honor your health and well-being over unhealthy patterns and behaviours – something gets confirmed in you. It took some time for me to see, but I realise now that I am valuing myself, and my life; I’m taking control and responsibility for my own health and well-being. No one else can do this for me but me.
When you start living consciously, you start creating your life out of love for your life. And I think this is the secret. Life is not happening to you but for you.
Also, and probably the most important factor of all: when you are satisfied and content—you don’t look for relief from that.
“Waking up this morning, I smile.
Twenty four brand new hours are before me.
I vow to live fully in each moment
and to look at all beings with eyes of compassion.“
– Thich Nhat Hanh
pic: my home for the next 4 days.
Finding your passion
What you are here to do does not have to be for a living. What you are here to do is to find a way of living that aligns you with your true nature. Something that will keep you present, something that will give your life more meaning, something that will help you live in harmony with your soul. Finding your purpose is really about finding your passion. Something that allows you to focus on simply ‘being,’ (in the moment, in a state of awareness, in the space of your soul), which takes the weight off your pain, and allows your true self to speak without the fear of not being heard.
Finding a passion is a very magical way of transforming pain and loss into something incredibly beautiful.
Reminder
It takes courage to step into your own shoes and live your truest, most passionate life. But this is your birthright; this is what you are here to do.
Softening into nature
I am currently at my little sanctuary in the middle of nowhere, and I’m celebrating as I have come full circle with my book ’Softening.’ I am looking forward to creating some space in my life for this blog, and a hardcover wellness journal that I have started putting together.
The poetry and notes in my next book are an invitation for you to observe yourself. To learn more about yourself. And to see that your power lies in becoming who you already are, and then nurturing yourself from there.
I hope you love the cover of the book as much as I do.
“Softening
Poetry and notes on becoming who you already are”
Release date: 1 December 2022
GIVEAWAY
I’ts not too late to enter my giveaway exclusive to this website. Leave a comment on my previous blog post “Softening” and I will put all names into a draw and announce the winners in a blog post on Sunday 27th November.
A snippet of my life:
Wild swim this week
I swam in the larger lake on Sunday morning as it was really busy in the Monet lake. The 3 people I met the first time I swam have very kindly taken me under their wings and suggested the larger lake. I loved it, and I was in for my record time. I’m also getting in quicker as my body is adapting. It was the best wild swim I’ve had; though the waterfall adventure today was pretty special too.
A lesson I’ve been reflecting upon lately:
Walking back up the muddy steps today, waterfall hair, dirt splashed joggers, and wet gear weighing me down, I had a realisation. I think we really must allow life to soak us to the bone. I think we really must get dirty, and carefree, and slip and slide our way back; because it alters you. You’re never the same when you arrive back.
A quote I really resonate with:
“It was about being true to the very stuff of life, it was about trying to capture, though you never could, the very feel of being alive. It was about finding a language.”
— Graham Swift, Mothering Sunday
This is a very beautiful, tender, tragic, poetic novel. A short book, but very long on emotion. Quite overwhelming at times.
This week, I’ve been grateful for:
Two very special events: a wonderful evening of candlelit yoga with my favourite instructor and beautiful friend Jess at The Bothy Wellness.
And the following day, being so fortunate to visit an incredible exhibition at the Scottish National Gallery on Saturday. My highlights below;
It’s an honor to be here sharing my words with you, and I am incredibly grateful for the time you have taken to read.
Thank you again for giving me the opportunity to expand and grow into this new space. For following along, for reading my work. Feel free to keep in touch: april@bloomforyourself.co.uk
Sending love and light always, April xxx